Well with one amatuer script posted on here, i figured id post mine from the summer, now remember that this is the first one i finished, and i know the ending sucks... criticizam please...

CAR CAR by Trevor Sliwkanich

Black Screen
PHONE RINGS. pause. PHONE RINGS. PICK UP.
DONNIE (VO)
Hello. Broke down? Where are you? Fourth Street? Okay 10 minutes.
CUT TO:
EXT. ON ROAD-DAY/NIGHT
Music of Donovan?s "CAR CAR" over various shots of cars driving. Credits on screen over sequence. At end of song "Car Car" on screen.
CUT TO BLACK:
FADE IN:
INT. CAR-NIGHT
MS- DONNIE is driving down a suburban type street bobbing his head to "SUNSHINE SUPERMAN".
CUT TO:
MS- Camera in back seat of car looking at Donnie who is still bobbing his head. He comes to an intersection and stops the car.
CUT TO:
(HH)MS- JENNY runs to the car and bangs both hands on the passenger window. She opens the door and gets in.
CUT TO:
LS- Camera on drivers side of car looking over it at two mob goons coming running from the ally SHOUTING and pointing at car.
CUT TO:
CU- Low angle shot. Car tires and the car drives away. The feet from the two goons come jogging into view.
CUT TO:
INT. CAR-NIGHT
MS- Camera in back seat of car. Donnie turns to look at Jenny. He looks back at the road.
DONNIE
Who were those guys?
JENNY
What guys? I?m Jenny by the way. That?s with an "N". Tow of them.
DONNIE
Yeah. I?m (main character). About those guys?

JENNY
Oh THOSE guys. Ya, just some goonies from the mob.
DONNIE
Ummmmmmmm? Like the mob mob?
JENNY
Is there any other kind?
DONNIE
Great, I guess I have to take you somewhere.
JENNY
Anywhere but the mob.
DONNIE
I have an idea.
FADE TO BLACK:
FADE IN:
Music playing is "Jennifer Juniper"
EXT. ANYWHERE-DAY
Shots of Donnie and Jenny running and frolicking for the duration of the song.
CUT TO:
EXT. STREET-NIGHT
LS-Camera low to the ground. The car is coming towards the camera. Two sets of feet walk in front of camera and the car comes to a stop.
CUT TO:
EXT. CAR-NIGHT
CU- Close up on Donnie face. Vertigo effect (tracking the camera forward whilst zooming out).
CUT TO:
LS- Camera in back seat of car. The two goonies walk to either side of the car. Donnie and Jenny start rustling in their seats. The two goonies open the doors and pull out Donnie and Jenny.
CUT TO:
INT. OFFICE-NIGHT
MS- LEO PASTRAMI is sitting at his desk. He pulls one stick of pepperoni out of a glass that has many. He lifts it up to his nose, and smells it. He puts it back. DOOR OPENS.
CUT TO:
LS- The door opens and the two goonies walk in with Donnie and Jenny.
GOONIE
We got ?em boss.
CUT TO:
MS- Leo sitting at his desk.
LEO
Good boys, you?ve done well.
Leo points towards the door. We hear the two goonies WALK OUT.
LEO
Come, sit. (pause) Now what compelled you to get involved in this grotty ladies life?
CUT TO:
MS- Camera behind Leo so you can see both Jenny and Donnie sitting in the chairs.
DONNIE
Well your Excellency, may I call you your Excellency? I was driving here to bring her to you when those two fine gentlemen intercepted me and brought both of us here. And just between you and me, I?ve wanted to get into this business for years.
JENNY
(Towards Donnie)
What?! How could you? I thought we had a connection? What about that song? You know?
Donnie leans over and whispers into Jenny?s ear. Jenny nods her head.
LEO
How can I be sure you aren?t trying to trick me?
DONNIE
How about a test?
LEO
Marvelous! A test. I?m gonna make you an offer you can?t refuse.
Jenny and Donnie look at each other worried. Leo takes a pepperoni stick and stars eating it.
LEO
Go get my beloved darling.
DONNIE
Your wife?
LEO
No silly, my singing trout! That thing cracks me up. The Hell?s Pigeons have it. Now go.
Leo waves his hand towards the door. Donnie gets up and walks out.
LEO
And how are you doing my dear?
CUT TO BLACK:
FADE IN:
EXT. STREET-NIGHT
MS- Donnie is walking sown the street. Camera is tracking along side him.
DONNIE
Ah, here?s the Hell?s Pigeons HQ.
He turns towards the house.
CUT TO:
INT. HQ-NIGHT
MS- A bunch of guys wearing leather jackets or other types of jackets and other stuff are sitting around a table. The big one is LITTLE FRED, and the little one is BIG JOHNNY. The singing trout is in the middle of the table.
BIG JOHNNY
Now this is all wrong.
LITTLE FRED
What do you mean?
BIG JOHNNY
Well the colour scheme should be lavender and puce.
ALL
(nodding heads)
(I agree) (Oh ya) (Sure) (Definitely)
Everyone is cut off by KNOCKING at the door.
LITTLE FRED
Who (clears throat) Who?s there?
DONNIE
(VO)
Ummmmmmmmm? I?m here to get the trout?
Everyone in the room starts panicking.
BIG JOHNNY
(jumping)
O? mi god, O? mi god!
CUT TO:

EXT. DOOR-NIGHT
CU- Side view of Donnie. The camera can see elbows and up. We hear the sound of the gang trying to get ORGANIZED.
LITTLE FRED (VO)
Come in stranger.
CUT TO:
INT. HQ-NIGHT
MS- Donnie walks in the door.
CUT TO:
MS- Big Johnny and Little Fred are standing in front of the gang.
LITTLE FRED
Little Fred (points at himself) and Big Johnny (points at Big Johnny) never go down with out a FIGHT.
CUT TO:
MS- Camera behind and above gang so Donnie can be seen plainly. Without delay, each member of the gang, one by one, goes to fight Donnie. Each of them loses. They all start crawling towards the door. Big Johnny and Little Fred look at each other and run towards the Donnie. Donnie side steps them and they keep running out the door. We hear them SCREAMING down the street. Donnie walks towards the camera, out of the shot, then walks back in with the trout. He walks out the door.
CUT TO:
INT. OFFICE-NIGHT
MS- Camera behind Leo looking at the door. In walks Donnie with the trout.
LEO
I see you have succeeded.
Donnie sets the trout on Leo?s desk.
DONNIE
You?re welcome.
Leo makes the trout sing. He starts bobbing and dancing in his chair to the "music". Donnie, with eyes wide open, stiffly walks out the door backwards.
CUT TO:
EXT. STREET-NIGHT
MS- Donnie is walking down the street towards the camera. When he gets close to it he stops.
DONNIE
JENNY!
He turns and runs away from the camera. The camera follows on a hand held shot. He runs into a building, past the 2 goonies, grabs Jenny, the camera stops, and they run out of the shot hand in hand.
CUT TO:
EXT. STREET-NIGHT
LS- The camera is on the ground of the sidewalk. The sound of running FOOTSTEPS is getting ever closer. Jenny?s and Donnie?s feet come into the show and run away from the camera.
CUT TO:
MS- "SUNSHINE SUPERMAN" is playing quietly in the background. Donnie and Jenny are running towards the camera. When they get closer they start to slow down. When they get to where their waists are at the bottom of the shot, and their heads at the top, the camera starts dollying backwards.
JENNY
Where?s your car dude?
DONNIE
Dude, where?s my car?
JENNY
Where?s your car dude?
DONNIE
Dude, where?s my car?
JENNY
Where?s your car dude?
DONNIE
Dude, where?s my car?
JENNY
Where?s your car dude?
DONNIE
Dude, where?s my car?
JENNY
Where?s your car dude?
DONNIE
Oh, there it is.
As Donnie says that, Jenny and him walk up to the car, get in and drive away as the camera continues to dolly backwards. The car drives out of sight and "SUNSHINE SUPERMAN" stars playing louder.
FADE TO:
EXT. STREET-NIGHT
LS- A LONE MAN is standing on the street. He has a suitcase next to him on the ground, and he is dressed in a business suit.
CUT TO:
MS- Waist up of Lone Man.
LONE MAN
Oh, here comes a car.
CUT TO:
LS- Lone Man waves down Donnie?s car. Donnie?s car slows down and stops. Lone Man walks up to Jenny?s window.
CUT TO:
MS- Through drivers and passengers windows. Lone man leans in the window.
LONE MAN
Can I ?ave a lift?
DONNIE
Sure, hop in.
LONE MAN in suit walks towards the back passenger door and begins to get in.
CUT TO:
INT. CAR-NIGHT
MS- The camera is in the back seat looking across to the rear passenger door (OBS). Lone Man gets in the door and sits in the middle seat.
LONE MAN
I must warn you I haven?t been myself lately.
CUT TO:
MS- Camera looking at middle back seat, only this time it?s from the passenger side (ABS). Now Lone Man is different. He is wearing different clothes. He has messy hair. I shall call him MAN X 2.
MAN X 2
No, he?s lying.
CUT TO:


OBS-
LONE MAN
Hey. You be nice. This nice man is giving us a ride.
CUT TO:
ABS-
MAN X 2
We?s don?t wan t a ride.
CUTR TO:
OBS-
LONE MAN
(leaning forward)
Yes we do, please pay no attention to my associate.
CUT TO:
ABS-
MAN X 2
Murderer.
CUT TO:
OBS-
LONE MAN
Well he does speak some truth.
CUT TO:
MS- Middle of front looking at Donnie.
DONNIE
What are you talking about?
CUT TO:
CU- On siutcase. Two hands open it up. One hand reaches in and slowly pulls out a long shiny knife.
CUT TO:
CU- On Lone Man?s face. He leans forward and lowers his eye brows and puts a sly smile on his face.
CUT TO:
CU- On Donnie?s face looking at Jenny/camera.
DONNIE
Jenny look out!
CUT TO:
EXT. STREET-NIGHT
LS- Camera looking at Jenny?s door. She leaps out and Lone Man is not far behind leaping out his door after her.
CUT TO:
HH- Camera behind Jenny and Lone Man running. Jenny stops and turns around. Lone man stops as well.
CUT TO:
HH- Camera behind Jenny, with her in shot. Camera looking at Lone Man. Donnie is running from the car at them. He ARRRRRGGGG?s as he leaps on mans back.
CUT TO:
CU- Camera looking up at Lone Man with Donnie on his back. Lone Man walks forwards then stutters back. He sways from the left to the right. Soon Donnie is in control. He begins to weigh Lone Man down. Man starts to move slower and more hunched down.
CUT TO:
MS- Behind Lone Man and Donnie. Lone Man falls down and Donnie rolls off of him as he falls. He picks himself up and wipes the grass off his clothes. He walks over to Jenny.
CUT TO:
MS- Jenny in shot. Donnie walks into the shot.
DONNIE
You OK?
JENNY
(impressed)
Yup. Where did you learn those moves?
DONNIE
What?
JENNY
Those MOVES.
DONNIE
Well I haven?t told many people this but?
Jenny Moves closer to him.
DONNIE
In grade 4, there was this girl, Bertha, who would sit on my head every recess. So one day I said to myself, ?She won?t sit on my head today?. So she kicked my shins.
Jenny walks out of the shot the same way Donnie came in.
DONNIE
(following her)
Now, after I got out of the hospital?
CUT TO BLACK:
CUT IN:
EXT. PARKING LOT-NIGHT
LS- The Hell?s Pigeons are gathered around a car with its hood up. Big Johnny is standing in front of Little Fred holding RITCHIE in front of himself. The rest of the gang is standing back looking ominous.
BIG JOHNNY
Where?s Donnie?

RITCHIE
I don?t know.
LITTLE FRED
(shaking Ritchie)
Talk or else
RITCHIE
Let me call ?im.
CUT TO:
EXT. STREET-NIGHT
LS- The car is coming towards the camera. It stutters, starts, stutters again. Just when it was about to seem like it was ok the car stops for good.
CUT TO:
INT. CAR-NIGHT
MS- Camera in back seat of car looking forwards.
JENNY
What?s wrong?
DONNIE
I don?t know, I had an extra 5 miles.
JENNY
Extra 5 miles?
DONNIE
Well, the gas gauge was on E, an I KNOW I get an extra 5 miles after that. Well I think we learned something important today.
JENNY
What that "E" means empty, not extra 5 miles.
DONNIE
Ya, Well?
Donnie opens his door and gets out. He leans back in.
DONNIE
I?m going to get gas. Stay here.
CUT TO:
EXT. STREET-NIGHT
MS- Waist up of Donnie walking down street from side. Camera crabs along side Donnie.

FADE TO:
CU- Camera pointing up at Donnie?s face.
DONNIE
I?m gonna die out here.
Camera pans over to see a gas station sign lit up. Donnie walks towards the pumps.
DONNIE
Oh, Nevermind.
CUT TO:
EXT. GAS STATION-NIGHT
LS- A GUY filling up a jerry can with gas.
CUT TO:
CU- Donnie?s head poking up over one of the pumps.
CUT TO:
LS- The jerry can is perpendicular to the camera. Donnie runs into the shot, grabs the jerry can, and runs out of the shot.
GUY
Help! Police!
CUT TO:

EXT. STREET-NIGHT
LS- Camera looking at side walk from street. Light pole in the "centre" of the screen. Donnie, with jerry can, followed by POLICE OFFICER run in and out of the shot. They do it again only in reverse direction. They run by again, only they are now running backwards played backwards. Donnie runs by again only this time when he crosses the pole, he comes out wearing gardening gear, he also does not have the jerry can.
CUT TO:
MS- Low angle. Donnie jumps into the garden. The cop comes walking into the shot from the wrong way. He stops so we can see both people.
POLICE OFFICER
Did you see a guy and a can run past here?
DONNIE
No?
POLICE OFFICER
Okay.(pause) Wait a minute, what are you doing?
DONNIE
What, don?t you like tulips?
Police Officer walks away. Donnie gets up and walks towards the house.
CUT TO:
LS- Donnie walks into the house. He turns on the light. We hear CRASHES. He walks out with his normal clothes on, and the jerry can in one hand and a lamp in the other. He walks out of the shot.
FADE TO BLACK:
FADE IN:
INT. PHONEBOOTH-NIGHT
CU- The phone is RINGING.
CUT TO:
EXT. STREET-NIGHT
LS- The phonebooth is in the middle of the screen. Donnie drives in and out of the shot. The Donnie and Jenny walk back in. Donnie picks up the phone.
DONNIE
Hello.
RITCHIE (VO)
Hello, is this Donnie?
DONNIE
Ritchie! Yes, Yes, Yes. Where are you?


RITCHIE (VO)
Well, by my calculations I am precisely 1.4 minutes away in the old parking lot.
DONNIE
Okay, I can get there in 2.
RITCHIE (VO)
Not good enough. The Hell?s Pigeons are holding me. They have a bomb in my car.
When Ritchie informs Donnie of this his mouth drops and his eyes go wide.
LITTLE FRED (VO)
It?s true? We didn?t like the way you interrupted us. Very rude.
DONNIE
Hang on Ritchie.
Donnie hangs up the phone. Him and Jenny run towards the left side of the screen, the camera picks up and becomes a hand held shot following him and Jenny running through various parts of town. "SEASON OF THE WITCH" is playing. This lasts for 1.5 minutes. They end up at Ritchie?s car with Ritchie just as it explodes. The three of them fly back.
CUT TO:
MS- The three of them pick themselves up and dust themselves off.
DONNIE
Now that doesn?t make a lick of sense.
RITCHIE
Well acctually it does. You see when we were talking we wasted some time.
JENNY
He?s right you know.
DONNIE
Well?
CUT TO:
MS-Little Fred and Big Johnny
LITTLE FRED AND BIG JOHNNY
He?s right you know.
CUT TO:
CU- Donnie?s head.

DONNIE
But?
CUT TO:
INT. OFFICE-NIGHT
LS- Leo and two goonies.
ALL
(shouting)
He?s right you know!
CUT TO:
EXT. PARKING LOT-NIGHT
CU- Donnie?s head.
DONNIE
Oh shut up.
CUT TO BLACK

so...(man im tired)
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